Life is Seeming So Unfair Right Now!

This is ever so difficult for me to come on here to rely the news that I have to give. I am sure many of you will be just as shocked as we were and still are! As I told you all before, I had the stitch (cerclage) placed two weeks ago and EVERYTHING was going so well with the pregnancy. Friday a week ago I had a follow-up appointment and everything there also checked out really good and I had been feeling wonderful... absolutely no complications.

But, I guess sometimes life throws you a curve ball... seems like we've been thrown way too many. Last Saturday I woke up at around 5 am and I decided to change positions. As I did, I felt a gush. Immediately panic set in and I rushed over to the bathroom only to discover that my water had broken. It was spontaneous and I had no pressure and no contractions. How could this be happening all over again for the third time? How could this be happening when I was feeling so well and had been experiencing an uncomplicated pregnancy for the first time?

Amelia Grace-Ann was born last Saturday morning at 4:59 am. She passed 4o minutes later in her daddy's hands! At only 18 weeks gestation she was so detailed and amazing. She looked even more like her daddy than her big sister Ava had!

We are all so devastated. We have been praying long and hard and we thought for sure our baby would be greeting us in the Fall. I just don't know what to do with myself and I'm losing all hope... I'm quickly losing faith and that scares me! The only consolation I have is that our girls are being cared for up in Heaven by their Pappy now!

My Dr. wants to do a complete medical work-up on me to determine what is going on with me that I keep abrupting my amniotic fluid. He believes there is another underlying cause aside from Incompetent Cervix and he wants to take a look at the shape of my Uterus with more indepth testing. I'm just eager to find out what is going on with me and I'm praying that what ever it is can be corrected!

Well, of course I'd like to leave this post with a few photos of our beautiful girlie! She has stolen our hearts!

On this Father's Day I just wish our precious baby girls could be with their Daddy! He loves them so much and I know Ava and Amelia would have his fingers wrapped tight! And I'm sure my girlies can give my Dad a great big hug for me today because I miss him soooo much... Happy Father's Day, Dad!

Baby Is Officially On Lock-Down!

Well, we knew that the time was coming where I would no doubt have to have the Cerclage Surgery in order to keep this pregnancy going, but still... I was hoping it could be avoided. I was hoping that since I was having no evident complications, by some miraculous miracle THIS pregnancy would be different than the previous two and perhaps I would not really have Incompetent Cervix (although I KNEW in my mind I did).

Last Friday, May 30th, I had an OB appointment to have my cervix checked (my Dr. has been checking my cervical length every 10 days). This was the first appointment that Mugi wasn't able to go along with me due to his work, so my mom took me. First the Dr. checked my cervix internally and told me that my cervix was still closed, which was good. Then he checked my cervical length via U/S and as soon as I saw the image, I knew it looked different than previous weeks. He said that he didn't like what he saw... there was definite shortening! He told me that it was time for the Cerclage and he wanted it placed right away... that same day. So before I knew it, I was admitted to the hospital and being prepped for surgery by noon, and off to recovery by 1:30 PM. I had to stay in the hospital overnight and Mugi was there just in time to meet me up in my room, so I was so very happy to see him.

So, the cerclage is in and baby is on lock-down and everything went really smoothly. All in all, I am just relieved that the procedure is done now so that I can finally be more at ease. I'm very grateful that the shortening was caught early on and that the procedure was "preventative" rather than "rescue"! I am not at all happy with the strict bed-rest that I am now on, but if that is what I have to do to secure the well-being of this baby, I will be attached to my bed EVERY day until October/November! We just are sooo excited for this baby's progress and we know that each and every day that passes is just closer to that day we will be bringing home our new son or daughter!

I do have my next appointment this Friday, so please continue to keep the three of us in prayer for continued strength! I'll update again as soon as I can!